it's like the eye of a duck

vvalkyri

If you're maybe noticing that you're older than you used to be, and are feeling sad/angry/confused/worried/frustrated that you haven't accomplished as much as you/other people in your present or past/annoyingly critical voices inside your head think you should have, and if you're maybe feeling something like "I'm not a real grownup like everyone else," and if you're maybe also feeling sad/angry/confused/worried/frustrated that your body isn't working the way it used to, and you're maybe thinking, "if that's true then how am I going to DO all those accomplishments that I/other people/voices in my head think I ought or want to do?", and maybe you're also wondering how are you going to dig out from under the accumulation of habit and procrastination and self-doubt to some sense of satisfaction in your life again, then post this same sentence in your journal.

• an Indian (Native American) costume my mom made out of tan sueded polyester (possibly not originally for Halloween, but got repurposed). Thinking back on how tiny the beads were and the hand-cut fringe, she must have worked hard on it.
  
• A Cowardly Lion costume made with the same tan material, plus dark brown for the mane and paws (strange that I still remember how the fabric felt more than anything else). I have long since surpassed my mom's sewing skills, but she was and is fantastic at getting the most out of her yardage :)
  
• doG help me, a cheerleader (I don't remember it, but I've seen the pictures) Green and white, complete with [shudder] pom poms....at least I can truly say it was Come As You Aren't :P
  
• I think my first one was Little Red Riding Hood. I've seen pictures of me in it when I was very small, a simple red hooded cape. I think my sister "inherited" it for her first Halloween.
  
• my last childhood trick or treating (age 13? 14?) I was a goth. Because, at the time I was... a goth/punk/indie kid. It was the costume of least effort :P
  
• A "rave toy" one year (as an adult) when I deliberately wore all white with sparkly makeup, just to not be wearing black :P
  
• I wore my fencing gear a couple of years back (again, a costume of least resistance). I thought about using the mask as a candy bowl but considering how much I sweat in the thing... ewww :P